Paraphrasing - A key communication skill
So let's explore this concept of paraphrasing a little further.
Have you ever wondered why it is that some people just seem to have "the gift of the gab"? We all know people like that right! They just seem to have this incredible flair for conversation and others are drawn to them like steel to a magnet.
Not only do they often seem to be the person that people are drawn to in a social and business settings, but they seem to have this uncanny knack of being able to open up the communication process in such a way that they have the most introverted people wanting to talk to them!
What exactly is it they are doing?
Have you ever analyzed their communication style and techniques? There might be some clues here………
Clearly people who "shine" when they are engaged in conversation with others are using a range of effective communication skills.
Mostly I would say they have honed their communication skills to such a level that it all comes very naturally to them and has become an integral part of what they do almost instinctively when they are communicating.
Similarly, learning how to paraphrase is equally important and an extremely effective tool when it comes to really understanding what the person you are communicating with has to say.
So many conversations can go in completely the wrong direction or end in misunderstandings because the "Receiver" of the information has simply misunderstood what the "Giver" of the information was really saying. Learning how to paraphrase can be a life saver when it comes to GAINING CLARITY from EVERY CONVERSATION!
In your network marketing business, or any business for that matter, building relationships through effective communication is imperative.
Effective communication helps you to build trust and people do business with the people they trust.
'MUST HAVE' Communication Skills
It is critical that you learn how to be an effective communicator by developing a range of skills such as:
So let's look at how learning how to paraphrase fits in to this list of "MUST HAVE SKILLS" when it comes to communicating effectively in your network marketing business.
Have you ever been lost for words when you are talking to a potential customer or business partner?
Have you ever wondered "What will I say now"?
Have you ever felt you lost your connection with your prospect simply because you didn't know how to fill those pregnant pauses?
Have you ever wondered how you can get your prospects eager to talk to you?
Well, have I got some good news for you!
Learning "How to Paraphrase" will stop those conversation "Dead Ends" and you'll never be lost for words again!
Learning how to paraphrase is an incredibly simple yet highly effective communication skill you MUST develop!
Once you learn how to paraphrase you'll wonder how you ever got along without it………and you'll find yourself doing it instinctively!
So let's get to the heart of the matter………
What is Paraphrasing?
Paraphrasing is a question that is designed to clarify the listeners understanding.
It is a question that helps the listener
or in other words the Receiver of the information
to be very clear about what the Giver of the information is:
In other words………
In your network marketing business it is crucial that you get to know your prospects, customers and business partners as well as you can in order to build long term trusting relationships. Learning how to paraphrase and integrate this skill into your communication will go a long way to assisting you to do this.
As a network marketing business owner it is extremely important that in all your communication you:
So let's get down to business here……...
What does a Paraphrase look like?
I hear you asking:
Here are some examples of paraphrasing………examples that you might come across anywhere but also could be quite relevant in a conversation about network marketing.
Take a peak at these and see what you think………
Etc, etc, etc………
What's a Good Paraphrase?
So what makes these statements paraphrases in the first place and what in fact represents a good paraphrase?
Here are the criteria for a good paraphrase - learn, practice and apply these 3 KEY points and you will learn how to paraphrase in all your conversations.
So that's it folks………if it doesn't have these 3 Key points, then it ain't a paraphrase I'm afraid!
Let's look at these 3 points in a little more detail.
Each paraphrase is phrased as a CLOSED question.
Because a paraphrase is essentially an opportunity for the listener to check their perception of what has just been said then it should always be phrased as a closed question because you do actually want a response.
You need to be clear that your perception is in fact correct and the only way to know this is to learn how to paraphrase in such a way that you are asking a question that initially requires a YES or NO response.
Each paraphrase starts with a PREFIX - such as the examples I referred to above.
The prefix is important because this is what ensures you get a response from your question.
It is all about learning, practicing and applying this skill to your day to day conversations. Please don't feel you MUST use one of the prefix examples given here. Just use what sounds natural, genuine and appropriate for your situation and your personality and communication style.
The point is, learn how to paraphrase so you can improve the flow and outcome of your conversations and feel more confident about communicating with your prospects, customers and business partners.
Each paraphrase contains a RE-STATEMENT
The re-statement should be short, no longer than one sentence. You don't want to confuse people with a long re-statement - you'll never get clarification that way. And, you don't want your paraphrase to turn out to be a mini summary!
To be accurate your re-statement must relate back to what has previously been said. For example, "So what you're saying is that this experience made you really happy?"
The prefix is in bold and the RE-STATEMENT is underlined.
Point to NOTE
Paraphrasing can sometimes be referred to as "reflective listening skills" or "reflecting feelings". Once again it is all about building rapport and trust with the people you are communicating with and it doesn't matter if you call it paraphrasing or reflective listening skills, at the end of the day it is a communication skill that is very effective when you use it competently!
Learning how to paraphrase accurately!
Well it is one thing to learn how to paraphrase, but it is quite another to make sure your paraphrases are accurate. That is after all what makes paraphrasing an important communication skill - the fact that you can get clarity from the communication.
This is where good listening skills come into play also. If you are using effective listening skills teamed up with paraphrasing then you have a pretty powerful combination.
There is no point is paraphrasing to gain clarity from a conversation if you haven't listened properly in the first place and your paraphrase is therefore a load of "old rubbish".
You certainly won't have any credibility or earn much respect at all from the person you are communicating with if you just paraphrase for the sake of it and are not really reflecting back to them an accurate snapshot of what they have just told you.
So the KEY to gaining the most from learning how to paraphrase is learn how to do it accurately!
Examples of Paraphrasing
Let me give you an example of paraphrasing accurately and not so accurately:
"I am really interested in learning more about your wellness products but every time I try to find out more about the products your company is selling I get a different story. I seem to get different information from everyone I speak too. No information is consistent. And then when it comes to the product prices, well I have to say, I'm totally confused - every price list I look at is different. Just to top things off, I don't know who I should be contacting to get accurate information and every time I speak to someone I seem to get conflicting advice………I'm just ready to give up on this completely!"
Possible accurate paraphrases:
An inaccurate paraphrase would be:
Does this make sense………?
You are certainly not going to get too far with this person if you use any version of inaccurate paraphrase such as the examples I have given here. They will really feel you are not listening to them and certainly don't care about how they feel.
However, on the other hand, if you use any of the accurate paraphrases provided or something similar, what do you think will happen with this conversation?
I think you will find that the person you are communicating with will realize you have really heard their concerns, be they fact, feeling or opinion and that will lead to further conversation and hopefully a favorable outcome for you both.
The big question is this………
If you didn't know how to paraphrase as suggested by these examples and you found yourself living this conversation, would you:
Learning how to paraphrase will help you manage the communication process with your prospect and have them EAGER to talk to YOU!
Let's look at another example………
"Well I have spoken with people about network marketing before and quite frankly, I wasn't impressed. It really concerns me that you have to approach your family and friends in this way - what say they're not interested? The last time someone contacted me about getting involved with network marketing they almost knocked down my door! When I answered the door they spewed their spiel all over me and I couldn't get a word in. It didn't matter what I said they just wouldn't get the message - I spent 15 minutes just trying to get them off my doorstep. I could never use those tactics on people I know, or even people I don't know for that matter. It's just not for me and quite frankly I think network marketing should be outlawed!"
Possible accurate paraphrases:
If you use a paraphrase like the examples given or something similar, is your prospect going to want to keep on talking to you? I strongly suspect they will. They will feel heard and their opinions and feelings valued.
So if you learn how to paraphrase in this way you are NOT going to be LOST FOR WORDS and there won't be any PREGNANT PAUSES in your conversations. You will be encouraging further communication and a positive outcome.
An inaccurate paraphrase would be:
Hmmmmm………Not going to be the winning any prizes for these responses I suspect!
Key point to Note
You will know whether or not you have paraphrased effectively by the person's response.
If they say "YES" then well done………
You know you have hit the target and 9 times out of 10 this will encourage further discussion.
If they say "NO" then it is a good thing that you paraphrased!
You know that you have not quite understood them and that some further clarification is needed - this is a great opportunity for further discussion.
How to paraphrase and gain clarity from every conversation
In summary here are some general guidelines for how to paraphrase effortlessly so you can gain clarity from every conversation you have in your network marketing business, and personally for that matter.
Remember, if you learn how to paraphrase you'll never be lost for words and your prospects, customers and business partners will be eager to talk to you!